My Gift/"Morning Poem" by Mary Oliver

I haven't really begun Assignment Two in earnest yet, but I did read ahead to see that it involves identifying my gifts that I bring to the program.

One of the things that I've always valued the most about myself is my sense of wonder. Every morning, when I wake up, I wake up amazed by details: the sunlight streaming in the window; the spiderweb it highlights; even the spider itself. I don't think I've ever put on my glasses (or put in my contacts) without uttering a simple prayer of thanks for the delight of seeing a blurry world come sharply into focus. I sit in my back yard and marvel over the small ecosystem in place -- the bunnies that live in the brush pile, the Koi and frogs and plants in the pond, even the skunk who makes his home under my porch, and has never sprayed me or anyone else coming or going in the over 3 years he's lived there!

In studying social psychology, I've learned that alcohol tends to bring out a person's most intrinsic nature; and while I realize that I shouldn't be using this journal to advocate for the overconsumption of alcohol, I do find it interesting to note that when I drink, I am not an angry drunk, nor a silly one, but an amazed one, entirely awestruck by the moon, the stars, the leaves on a tree or the face of a stranger. I am fortunate that I take this with me; it is a trait merely enhanced by alcohol, when the lowering of inhibitions strips away the jading ascribed by the world.

It seems that Francis was gifted with some of this same constant amazement [insert quote from Bodo book here!].

I found this poem by chance; a portion was excerpted in a colleague's e-mail .sig file. It seems to fit my thoughts on both stewardship and amazement. And it describes my mood upon waking every day...


"Morning Poem" by Mary Oliver

Every morning
the world
is created.
Under the orange

sticks of the sun
the heaped
ashes of the night
turn into leaves again

and fasten themselves to the high branches ---
and the ponds appear
like black cloth
on which are painted islands

of summer lilies.
If it is your nature
to be happy
you will swim away along the soft trails

for hours, your imagination
alighting everywhere.
And if your spirit
carries within it

the thorn
that is heavier than lead ---
if it's all you can do
to keep on trudging ---

there is still
somewhere deep within you
a beast shouting that the earth
is exactly what it wanted ---

each pond with its blazing lilies
is a prayer heard and answered
lavishly,
every morning,

whether or not
you have ever dared to be happy,
whether or not
you have ever dared to pray.

from Dream Work (1986) by Mary Oliver

Yellow Workbook -- Assignment One

I haven't posted on this yet, but I am creating this post as a placeholder. Within the next couple of days, I hope to post the assignment, and my response to it. I was going to do that tonight, but I forgot to bring it to bed with me. So it will have to wait.

"Canticle of the Sun" by St. Francis of Assisi (a little context)

For a little context for my last post, I decided to post this translation of St. Francis's Laudes Creaturarum ("Praise of the Creatures"), more commonly known among English-speakers as "Canticle of the Sun." The translation I chose is one that has Biblical references included.

The Canticle of Brother Son
or The Praises of the Creatures 1

[CantSol]


The Canticle of Brother Sun is the very first work of literature in the Italian language. St. Francis composed it most likely during the winter of 1224-5 A.D.—possibly while at the Church of San Damiano, in Assisi 2—as grace, born of suffering, urged him to praise and glorify the Most Holy Trinity even unto death. The Canticle of Brother Sun first appears in the historical record in a reference made by Bl. Thomas of Celano in his Vita Prima, written 1228 A.D. 3



Most High, Omnipotent, Good Lord,
Thine be the praises, the glory, and the honor and every blessing (cf. Apoc. 4:9.11).

To Thee alone, Most High, do they belong
and no man is worthy to mention Thee.

May Thou be praised, my Lord, with all Thy creatures (cf. Tob. 8:7),
especially mister brother sun,
of whom is the day, and Thou enlightens us through him.

And he is beautiful and radiant with a great splendor,
of Thee, Most High, does he convey the meaning

May Thou be praised, my Lord, for 4 sister moon and the stars (cf. Ps. 148:3),
in heaven Thou has made them clear and precious and beautiful

May Thou be praised, my Lord, for brother wind,
and for the air and the cloudy and the clear weather and every weather (cf. Dan 3:64-65), through which to all Thy creatures Thou gives sustenance (cf. Ps. 103:13-14)

May Thou be praised, my Lord, for sister water,
who is very useful and humble and precious and chaste

May Thou be praised, my lord, for brother fire (cf. Dan 3:66),
through whom Thou illumines the night,
and he is handsome and jocund and robust and strong

May Thou be praised, my Lord, for our sister, mother earth, (cf. Dan 3:74)
who sustains us and governs,
and produces various fruits with colored flowers and green plants (cf. Ps 103:13-14)

May Thou be praised, my Lord, for those who forgive for the sake of Thy love 5 (cf. Mt 6:12),
and endure infirmity and tribulation

Blessed those who endure them in peace (cf. Mt 5:10),
because by Thee, Most High, will they be crowned

May Thou be praised, my Lord, for our sister, bodily death,
whom no man living can escape

Woe to those, who die in mortal sin: 6
blessed those whom she 7 will find in Thy most holy desires,
because the second death will do them no evil (cf. Apoc 2:11; 20:6)

Praise and bless my Lord (cf. Dan 3:85),
and give Him thanks and serve Him with great humility!

Source: http://www.franciscan-archive.org/patriarcha/opera/canticle.html

"The Sun Song" by Michael Tolcher

[Verse 1]
One more beginning for as long as it lasts
A new day for the living all forgiving of the past
A heavy foot steps to the dark unknown
This is a mystery
No security of home

[Chorus]
Here comes the sun
Over my head
Show me a path and i'll be led
Walking alone
I'm not afraid

I have my wings to fly away

[Verse 2]
There's been a fever burning holes in your skin
A million questions
Let the journey begin
Want with a reason and you'll understand
The source is infinite
So, choose your demand

[Chorus]
Here comes the sun
Over my head
Show me a path and i'll be led
Walking alone
I'm not afraid

I have my wings to fly away

[Verse 3]
Send in the messengers
Let the story be told
Set free philosophy with the medicines old
One in a body of a sacred plan
Part of a vision
Believe and you can

[Chorus]
Here comes the sun
Over my head
Show me a path and i'll be led
Walking alone
I'm not afraid

I have my wings to fly away

Source: http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/michaeltolcher/thesunsong.html


I found the above song, tonight, while looking for another song by the same artist ("Sooner or Later," which I discovered as the themesong for the short-lived but excellent teen drama, Life As We Know It, based on an equally excellent YA novel by Melvin Burgess). I think it sums up a lot of what I was trying to say a week and a half ago when I met with Sr. Mary to discuss my first assignment from the yellow associate process workbook. It's late, and I'm tired now, but I will write more about that tomorrow. But I wanted to listen to the song on Rhapsody.com and read the lyrics one more time before turning in, tonight. And I wanted to share it here.

Goodnight!

Haunted By Francis

I hope to make my Covenant Statement next summer, or perhaps sooner. This summer, during Community Days, I attended a friend's Covenant Ceremony. This was an amazing experience, and I am glad that she shared this special day with me by inviting me to the ceremony.

I first became acquainted with the Tiffin Franciscans through the mentoring and friendship of my parish's former Pastoral Leader, Sr. Mary. I first learned of the Associate program through my friend Barb (an Associate of the Tiffins) and also through my friend Erin (whose ceremony I just attended).

I can't claim to have felt one particular, specific Call. There was no shocking moment of epiphany; my metanoia was much more subtle and much more of a process than that. I do know that once I became aware of the Associate program, earlier feelings that I'd perhaps misinterpreted suddenly made sense. As a young child, I felt Called to religious life. But over time, and as a result of some specific experiences, I became convinced that I had never truly heard a Call. Years later, after reconciling a lot of my feelings about the Church (as a hierarchy), I interpreted that earlier Call as a Call to social justice work as a layperson. And this interpretation did fit with my life and experiences and values. But once I became aware of the Associate program, my interpretation shifted once more... and for the first time, there was a sense of finding the right fit.

It was at this time that I began to be "Haunted by Francis," as my friend Erin so lovingly puts it. Images of St. Francis began to surround me; or, more accurately, I became extremely aware of how much St. Francis was already a part of my life. From the St. Francis statue of my mother's that I broke during my childhood to the one my father's sister gave her as a replacement; from the Prayer of St. Francis card that I have carried in my wallet since my teen years, even though it was acquired during a time in my life when I was intent on disavowing all relationship with the Church to the sung version I have cherished since my arrival at St. Tom's; from the Carruth St. Francis that hangs in my mulberry tree, a gift from my friend Joey, to the plastic statuette of St. Clare that this same friend unknowingly gave me just because he worked in television and dug that she was the patron saint of TV... from childhood on, St. Francis has been a daily companion and member of my household.

My formation is still ongoing, and in some ways, barely begun. But although I could not have predicted this path for myself, realizing the direction that it would take me was neither shocking nor unfamiliar. It simply felt like finding a name for something I already knew I should be. Franciscan ideals felt familiar and comfortable to me, as if I'd been raised a Franciscan... and it turns out, I practically was!

I never knew my maternal grandmother, who died before I was born, but my mother has always said that my personality reminded her of her own mother. When I told my mother of my plans to become an Associate, she then revealed to me that her mother had been a 3rd Order Secular Franciscan. No wonder the values she passed down to me felt so familiar when I encountered them in a formal way! My mother and her sister know very few details, but I would like to research my grandmother's involvement... ad I suspect that this research will be part of my own current journey.

---

I don't suppose that anyone reading this (if, indeed, anyone is reading this) is familiar with the Franciscan community in the Grand Rapids, MI area? This would have been most likely in the 1930s through '60s. I realize that this plea for information is a longshot, and that I have not even begun my own research, but I figure it's worth a shot...

A Few Definitions

I am in the process of becoming an Associate of the Sisters of St. Francis of Penance and Charity of Tiffin, Ohio.

A lot of people don't know what that means, when I tell them. It isn't easy to explain, because it is something for which there isn't really an easy comparison to put it in context. The moment people hear the words "sisters" and "convent," they tend to assume that I am in the process of becoming a nun. This is incorrect for two reasons.

• The first is that most people don't define nun correctly -- they don't realize that it isn't a slang or informal term inclusive of all Catholic sisters, and that it actually refers only to cloistered Sisters. Most popular culture images of "nuns" actully depict non-cloistered Sisters.


• The second, of course, is that I am not becoming even what they imagine a "nun" to be -- becoming an Associate is not the same as becoming a Sister, nor is it (necessarily) a step toward becoming one.

It is impossible to adequately define "Associate" by comparing the term solely to what it is not. So what is an Associate? Basically, an Associate is a secular participant in an Order's community. There are 3 levels of Association available with the Tiffin Franciscans.

• The first is to be a prayer partner, someone who supports the values and charism of the Sisters, and who prays for their intentions, but who does not tend to take an active role in the life of the community.


• The second is to not only support the values and charism of the Sisters and pray for their intentions, but to take a more active role in the life of the community -- to attend Retreats and Community Days and other events at the convent, as well as to volunteer to be involved with the causes and concerns of the Sisters and Associates, and to serve on committees, etc., while maintaining a life that is primarily in the secular world.


• The third is to embrace the daily life of the convent, perhaps to move onto the grounds of the Motherhouse, or to live in community with Sisters and/or other Associates.

At this time, I am seeking second level Association.